A nightmare?
by Wingedhatchling
Summary: "Kato punch me..." Britt's lustful nature gets him in trouble when he crosses a psychotic women. Kato has to help 'him' out, as he tries to deal with his new life. This is a oneshot.


I'd just like to say, they may seem a little out of character since I find swearing unnecessary, the movie is fresh in my mind, and due to my twisted writing addiction of this 'type' of story I had to write this. Also it's more fun to read if you imagine Kato's accent. I hope you enjoy it.

"What happened," Britt groaned, as he propped him-self up. Around him was his room in wreckage. Next to him was exactly three beer bottles two empty. So Britt turned them into three empty beer bottles.

In his now slightly drunken state Britt went to his dresser. Nothing would fit him, weird. So he threw on a tight shirt and some really loose pants. He groaned out his second question of the day, "What time is it?"

It was light out at least, and Kato was driving up the driveway. Britt instantly ran down the stairs, ready to, once again, brag about how he had saved his life from 'Blood-nofskey'. Maybe even guilt him into making some coffee, without getting him-self killed.

"Kato, my man!" Wow his voice was hoarse, "Ready for a day of watching me do some butt-kicking?"

Kato's eyes widened, glanced down, and then he seemed to recover from something. Then with what seemed self-control he asked, "Uh, Ma'am do you know where Britt is."

"What are you talking about dude?" Britt growled in confusion, "I'm right here! Don't tell me that you've gone crazy. Who else can drive the car, since you labeled everything in that cursed Japanese!"

"How do you know about that," Kato had gone into a defensive mode, "What did that moron tell you!"

"What's wrong with you!" Britt screamed at him, "It's like you don't know me!"

"Then we have met," The martial artist seemed unconvinced, "But who are you?"

"I'm Britt!" The Green Hornet screeched, "Why Don't You Recognize Me!" wait Kato had called him something earlier. What was it…

"Ma'am you are confused," That was it!

"Well you're a blind retard, if you think I'm a chick!" Britt dropped his pants, to make his point. Something was missing (Give ya three guesses). As if in a haze of confusion the women stumbled to the bathroom. She stared into the mirror, the alcohol confusing her. The women in the mirror had Britt's color hair and eyes. It could have been Britt's long lost twin sister. She opened her mouth, "Kato there's a girl in the mirror," Then with realization a piercing scream filled the house. "Oh no, no, no, no."

This was just a bad dream. A really, really bad dream. Britt would wake up any second, and laugh about this.

"Why did you scream?" Kato's voice was behind her.

"What," The green hornettess was trembling, "Kato this is just a dream. A sick perverted dream. Why would I dream of this? Wait, this must be your dream. Yeah, somehow our brother spirituality must have made us merge subconscious. Kato you are such a pervert!"

"What?" Now Kato was really confused, "You need to lie down. Rest a little,"

"Oh no," Britt backed up, "I know where lying down leads to in my dreams."

The mechanic seemed to be getting impatient, "You must be very confused and drunk. Sleep on the couch until Britt gets back, now." He snatched the hornettes's arm and started to try to lead her away.

Britt started to try desperately prove that she was him. "I won't be coming, since I'm right here! Uh, I have a crush on my secretary, we beat the crap out of bloodnofsky, I saved your freaking life!" That at least made Kato stop walking, now to finish it up, "I'm the Green Hornet!"

"But you can not be Britt…" Kato looked down at the stubborn women, "You…you…but Britt is taller then me, and a guy…he must have told you these things to get you to sleep with him. You are even wearing his clothes."

"I don't need to lie to get a girl to sleep with me!" Britt barked at him, "I can get any girl I want…except for the one I want...And if I am him then I would be wearing my clothes!"

"You sound like Britt…" Kato considered the ridiculous possibility, "But how could Britt be you?"

"I don't know…" Britt gained a dumb expression, as she started to think. A couple minutes later, "OH, what if I was exposed to toxic waste or something…" Kato just looked at her, "It happened in comic books…"

"I'm starting to believe you." Kato informed her, "Only Britt is that much of an idiot."

"Whatever Mr. Madgenius," Britt glared at her partner, who was not looking down as if considering something.

"That would also explain why you are not wearing, um, female undergarments."

"What?" Britt followed Kato's gaze, "Whoa," He grabbed his newly acquired chest, "Not bad...Kato you pervert! If you draw me, I swear!"

Kato smiled, "I do not know how, but now I know you are Britt."

"Told ya!" Britt lifted her hand for a high five. Even as a girl her partner left her hanging, "Now you can help me wake up."

"We are not dreaming." Kato gained a confused look, "So how…"

The Hornettess ignored her partner as she started to pinch her self, cursing as each one failed to 'wake' her. Maybe she needed something horrible to wake her up. Just like when you always wake up right before you die in nightmares. Or something more painful. She glanced at Kato. "Kato hurt me."

"What?"

"That will shock me awake," She was now confident in her plan, "Now punch me!"

"No," Truthfully Kato felt a little uncomfortable punching a harmless girl. Especially, since Britt was a horrible fight with his brute strength to begin with.

"Don't make me make you punch me." The hornettess threatened. Then she flung her fist forward, and growled when Kato caught it. She let a kick fly, only to be blocked, again. She tried over and over, never succeeding. "I'm just not used to this body." Britt tried to make up for horrible fighting, "More reason to end this dream earlier."

Only one strategy left, verbal assault, "kato go get me some coffee!"

"What?" Darn it didn't work.

"Well, you're an idiot sidekick, who no one knows exists, and you couldn't get a girl worth your life. In fact you've already proved that you have to lie about getting some. All your good for is your stupid coffee!" She threw in a few names directed at Kato and his mother, that he really shouldn't have said. (Get creative)

Kato twitched, his grip on her arm growing tighter, and his face tightened and red. He marched her upstairs, letting her slam into every object in their path. "You want to wake up?"

"Good, oof, okay it's not working." Britt yelped as she slammed into a chair, "Okay stop! Pain isn't going to wake me up I get it!"

"You still think your asleep!" A red Kato yelled, as he continued to pull the hornettess now literally dragging her up the stairs.

"Calm down, psycho," The clumsy girl cried out, as tried to reason with the pissed of man, "I'm sorry, dude! I was just trying to get you to beat me up!"

"Congratulations," Her partner finally stopped, as his self-control slowly came back. He helped the battered bruised women to her feet, and pulled one of her arms over his shoulder, to help her limp up the stairs, as she told him off.

"Remind me only to piss you off when I got my sexy muscle to back my-self up. Why are we going up-stairs anyways?"

"You went to sleep as a man and woke up as a women right?" Kato questioned

"Yeah, except this is a dream." Britt answered, "Well I'll go along with your crazy ideas. Its better then being dragged up the stairs!"

Her partner continued to ignore her complaints, "Then something must have happened during the night. There may be something that shows what happened to you."

"Oh," The hornettess replied, feeling stupid, that she hadn't realized the obvious.

They walked into the trashed room, and started investigate. Together they found a pair of pink laced female panties, a shattered needle with a blue liquid on the glass, and, a tiny hole in the sleeve of Britt's clothes from last night.

"So?" Britt looked at the evidence, and slowly realized what must have happened. Kato, of course, realized it sooner.

"You brought home a slut, and she stabbed you with a blue liquid, that turned you into a girl?" It sounded weird, even if the evidence was in front of them.

"So this is what your dreams are like." Britt nodded impressed, "But, if this is a dream then, why am I so hungry?"

Kato rolled his eyes, and led the limping girl back downstairs to have lunch. All the time Britt held her head high, she truly wondered when this ;nightmare would end.'

Theres the first Chappie. I tried to use Kato's short temper against him, because he can really get ticked off when it comes to Britt. It's a little on the short side, for my taste. I'll try to write more, and hope your not wierded out by Genderbending. 7th story up, for The Green Hornet.


End file.
